SHE SAYS MAMA!!!!!!!!!

Big day for Cool Mom, huge! I’m hanging on to this win with everything I got.  It’s my current sanity parachute right now because off this mega Mom victory, I’m actually currently engaged in battle with this child prodigy, this Mom-sayer.  Cool Mom is not that religious, but someone upstairs was pulling for me today (and yes I realize it’s only 8:15 AM, but I’ve already had a four hour day so there).

So remember our tummy troubles?  Major red herring.  While we were focusing on what finally amounted to raging constipation, we weren’t noticing something important.  The Handful who is almost 9 months old, can’t roll over.  What I learned yesterday from our physical therapist is that more and more of the therapists are noticing a big trend in babies who don’t roll over by 4 months and that’s a lack of gross motor development.  Pediatricians are just now starting to draw a lot of connections back to this missed milestone and are finding out that the inability to roll over is a more serious issue than they previously believed.  This would have gone unchecked until The Handful turned 1 and was flagged for not crawling.  Not on my watch.

A nice advantage of our (admittedly aggressive) Mommy & Me class schedule is that I get to see a LOT of babies.  I probably see an average of 20 babies a week.  That’s more than a typical SAHM (stay at home mom).  What I was seeing was 19 of these 20 babies all doing one movement, and my kid is doing what I described as “work arounds” – in an example: all the other kids will go after in some form (via crawl, walk, army crawl or tummy scooch) a light up ball and they’ll all try with all they have to get to the ball.  The Handful expresses interest in the ball and will indicate a desire to have the ball, but will make not one gesture aside from the flailing of her arms to get to it.  So that was odd.  Another odd thing I kept noticing was this weird Superman pose she does on her tummy that still to this day I’ve never seen another kid do.  Then my mom friends started posting videos on Instagram of their babies who are younger than The Handful pulling up to stand and bearing weight on their legs.  So I was curious, what happens when you put The Handful in the standing position? Her legs collapse.  You actually can’t get the girl to stand.  She won’t do it, she’ll either pike up her legs straight out (and bend at the waist), or she’ll collapse under the weight of her body with jelly legs.

Google sucks on this one, I tried every iteration I could think of of these issues and came up basically dry.  Looks like I’m gonna have to be your spirit guide on this one folks.  Another thing I encountered was a TON of people telling me this isn’t a big deal and they know a kid or their kid never crawled and turned out fine.  Yeah thanks you bunch of experts.  I’m just gonna say never in my life has my gut instinct been 100% right as it has been in the medical issues with my child.  I am always greeted with a raised eyebrow at first and then I get confirmation that I was fucking right once again and have an issue.  I’m done with you idiots and your “its not a problem” nonsense.  Therapist explains that the not rolling becomes an equilibrium thing where the longer she doesn’t roll, the more uncomfortable it is for her when she does. So she is incentivized at a certain point to just not make herself uncomfortable.  Next step is off not doing that behavior, her muscles in her arms and legs don’t develop because they’re not being used.  But, she is gaining weight.  So she gets heavier, her muscles essentially get weaker and by 12 months I have a MUCH harder battle to fight.  Thanks for NO ONE alerting me at the 4 month marker and instead making me feel crazy for raising the issue.  Ok so that’s the basic gist of what I’m up against.

Good news is Cool Mom is done listening to peasants and dragged our booties into the specialist to get ahead of it.  Annoying news is try getting a non verbal baby to understand the concept of doing exercises to get better.  My normally happy smiley baby turned into a full gremlin at the PT Sesh because all the positions she had to be in were really uncomfortable for her. Blatant parenting brag warning: because The Handful is so smart, she was using a tool and trying to manipulate objects to come to her instead of working her body to go get them.  Therapist said that could’ve contributed to this potentially going unnoticed because if you ask me the question “can The Handful get this object” the answer sometimes IS yes, but did she retrieve said object in a creative problem solving manner instead of physically getting it … (I’m allowed to brag, I feel really insecure right now you guys!)

We leave Therapist with a packet of exercises and a follow up in two weeks.  On the one hand I feel empowered that we can right the ship and stay on course, but on the other I’m a little emotional because we didn’t get “good” news.  I watched my kid fail a lot of tests in the initial consultation and it’s a scary thing seeing your kid unable to do what the other kids can do.  My strategy is to Cool Mom the shit outta this therapy and just hit it as hard as I hit the gym.  If we run full speed we can plow through the wall.  Now I just have to get The Handful on board because this morning’s workout left a lot of room for improvement.  You all know how smiley my baby is, like she’s perma giggles and this morning she was giving me attitude like a 5 year old who watches too much Nickelodeon.

But  THEN …!! She ended our torture session with MAMA!!!!! Arms outstretched, reaching up and repeatedly and clearly saying MAMA!  And that honestly does erase some of the bad feels entirely and replaces them with a WIN!!!  So for me, February 2, 2016 will be remembered as the day she said MAMA!!! And that’s how I’m manually coding it in the memory brain.

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